Saturday, October 6, 2012

We Love You, Nanny... God Bless... It's True!

This morning we had the memorial service and burial for my beautiful, dear grandmother, whom we affectionately call, "Nanny."  It was a beautiful, sunny day here in Southern Florida and some of our family and my grandparents' friends were there to join us in remembering my Nanny and pay our respects and send her our Love and warm thoughts as she her body was being laid to rest. 

I loved my grandmother so much... and still do, that I am almost at a loss for words as to what I can even say that will do justice to her and how much she means to me and how much I Love her.  She was truly like a best friend to me, and I her.  A long time ago, I bought her a little, white, guardian angel bear and when you pressed it's stomach it would say, (in a cute little voice), "I'm your guardian angel... I'm your special friend! She Loved this gift so much, and it was priceless to her... and throughout the years, she would play it to me on the phone and would tell me that I was like her guardian angle and best friend. We were very close, (as I am her only granddaughter and my children are her only great-grandchildren).

When we went to her house to visit her a few weeks ago, while she was very sick, shorty before God called her Home, she was in her home where she lived with my grandfather, and she spent most of her time on the couch where she could be as comfortable as possible, and still be around the family and friends there visiting with her.  She was happy to see all of us, but, I believe most especially happy to see her two beautiful great-grandaughters!!!

Seeing them and holding them made her so very happy and the smile on her face and Light in her eyes that their presence brought to her was just priceless!  Audrey's special gift to Nanny was... (just like I did when I was younger...), she wanted to give Nanny the special gift of song and dance to light up her day and make her a little bit happier.  Thus, she insisted that I and Grave too, sing and dance with her for Nanny... (all kinds of songs), though, she kept coming back to one of her favorites... "Oh, Mister Sun, Sun, Mister Golden Sun... please shine down on Nanny!"  And when Audrey said, "Nanny," she would gesture her hands towards Nanny, like a true show girl!  It was so touching and endearing... and I know it really touched and blessed my grandmother's heart!!!  <3

My grandmother was a classy lady.  She was a very stong person, who like me, had been through some very difficult and challenging times, and she would often remind me, throughout my life, during my most difficult and trying times, how stong I was as well... and that she believed in me and knew that, "With the help of God," (as she always would say...), "I know you will make it through this, because you are strong like me, and we come from strong stock!"  :)

It is God's help, His Grace and favor that make us strong indeed, and I believe we have both learned throughout our lives just what the Bible says... that when we are at our weakest... we are at our strongest... becuase, truly, "God's Grace is enough!!!"  :)  My grandmother was always praying for me, and me her. And we will contine to do this still.

We of great Faith, although, sad for a time because we are going to miss her... know and believe that her soul is in God's Loving care... and truly, certainly without a doubt... he will raise her to eternal Life and we surely shall see her again.

And so today, again, though sad for a time, is not a day of deep sorrow, (at least not for me and my daughters), but a day of JOY... as we rejoice in the fact that God I am sure said to her, "Well done, good and faithful servant!" and we need not say, "goodbye," but rather, "until we meet again!"

I will always remember her sharp and witty sense of humor... and sweet things she would always say, such as, "No where to lie..." and when somebody would sneeze, she would say, "God bless... it's true!"  I will miss her frequent phone calls just to say, "Hello," how happy it always made me to hear her voice and how she endearingly would say my name, in her wonderful New York accent... and so much more!  Yet, these precious memories are not lost but will live on in my heart and in the hearts of all who Loved her, forever more!

It was so very special for my daughters to be able to know their Great Grandmother.  It was a true honor and privilege and I am sure they will cherish the memories we have made with her as well as all the pictures and videos I will show them as they grow older.

We LOVE you, Nanny, so much, more than we may have ever known, and we will continue Loving you and praying for you forever more!  Please remember to pray for us too, as I am sure you already have and will continue to.

May God's perpetual Light and Love continue to shine down upon you always... Amen!  :)

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Let The Little Children Come To Me

Jesus said, "Let the children come to Me," and He meant it... because although He Loves everybody, He Loves the little children most of all! Before we are too quick to judge a child and think or say, "He or she is this or that..." we must see them as Jesus does and Love them as He does... and remember too that He tells us all in Sacred Scripture, "Unless you become like a little child, you shall not enter the Kingdom of Heaven." 

To some, I am sure that might not mean much, though, I can guarantee, that for those this doesn't mean much to, they will be thinking very differently about these meaningful words of Jesus at the end of their life if they are blessed enough to have such time to think of these words.

I say this because my beloved grandmother was called Home to be with our Lord in Heaven this past Wednesday and we have spent the last few days at the services of her wake, (and viewing), and yesterday, at Church for her funeral Mass.

Both of my daughters, Audrey and Grace were there as well as some of my family members, and friends of our family and my grandparents. This was the first experience of the death of a Loved one that my daughetrs had to face, and of course, Baby Grace, at just 5 months, was a little bit too young to at least verbalize how she felt about it all, my precious daughter, Audrey, at 2 1/2 was very much a part of all of it, taking every bit of it in and then expressing in her own, special, innocent way how she felt about it all.

My parents, my 2 daughters and myself have been here in Southern Florida visiting with my grandparents for about the past 20 days or so. We came here to visit and stay at my grandparent's home because my grandmother was very ill and we didn't know how much longer she had on this Earth to live, (as none of us know for sure), though, we wanted to come and visit her... to help brighten her days and help her to feel better which she did.

She Loved seeing us, and most especially visiting with Baby Grace and Audrey! Grace Loved to kiss her on the cheek, which made my grandmother so happy and Audrey and I sang her little songs and danced for her which she Loved as well. Though, even though, her spirit was uplifted her body was getting tired and was not recovering. Hope Hospice came in to help and shortly after, she was brought to their Hope House for the last days of her life here on Earth.

At the wake... as soon as Audrey saw our grandmother, whom we call, "Nanny," she said, "Mama... Nanny is born!" and she said this several times.  I was so touched, even if someone else might not have known what she was talking about... I did! And I said, "Yes, Audrey, she is born to Eternal Life!" What a beautiful message God inspired Audrey to deliver! Out of the mouth of babes!  :)

Audrey was so sweet at the wake, as she kept going up to the casket and touching Nanny's hand, and saying, "Mama, I want to hold Nanny's hand!"  and "Mama, look... Nanny has a rosary!" and "Mama, Nanny is not sick any more!"  She also, (when she thought no one was looking, perhaps), took her binki, (pacifier), her most favored and beloved, "yellow blanki," and her stuffed animal bear and placed them in the far end of the casket near Nanny's feet. I waited a moment before asking her to remove them.  I was so touched at the sentiment... that was her own, special way of saying, I Love these things... they belong to me and I want you to have them!"  It was really quite touching and sweet.

I had the privilege and honor of singing at my grandmother's funeral Mass, as the cantor.  This was something quite familiar to me, as a Church cantor having cantored at Mass, weddings and funerals for over 6 years.  I also had the honor and privilege of singing at my brother, George's funeral Mass in this same Church 18 years ago so this was extra-special to me.

I really thought that Audrey and Grace would be OK with me being the cantor and not being able to sit with them during the Mass, because Grace is still so small and often times sleeps through Mass and is very quiet even when she's awake and Audrey never seemed to have much of a problem with me, (except for one time), singing in Mass with the choir, while she sat with my parents. Though, all that I can say is... as much as you can plan and or envision something to go one way or another... the fact is... it's gonna just go the way it's gonna go... and ultimately, God is in control... ands when we TRUST in Him and His Divine Providence and Wisdom.... it really is ALL good, as they say!

That being said... I was up on the padella at the ambo, singing, our prelude, "Let There Be Peace On Earth," and the doors to the back of the chapel where the Mass was open and my grandmother's casket was there, the priest was there, my family... and there was my precious Audrey crying, "Mama!!! I want Mama!!!" with big, big tears running down her face!  I felt so bad, I wanted to cry myself! And still, what could I really do, other than sing, other than stop singing and run to the back of the chapel to rescue her... (which wasn't far from my mind, BTW!).  I hoped that she would stop crying, but had a feeling she wouldn't at that point so I just prayed that someone would be kind enough and compassionate enough to bring her to me!  God heard my prayer, quite quickly and within what seemed like moments, her gently took her by the hand and walked her up the padella to me.

The next thing I know, I have her on my hip and we were both singing together.  It was actually very sweet considering the circumstances... of how well she had done up until that point of being away from home and her friends and her classes at the YMCA for so long, being in my grandparent's house, watching her great-grandmother die and having to listen to the crying that followed and sorrow that filled the house. My mom and grandfather were crying at the funeral Mass and they are, "grown-ups," and so it only made sense that a little 2 1/2 year old would cry as well, and want her Mama.

It was fine that she was up there with me, and at times walking around on the padella.  A few other people seemed to have a problem with it, but... I just hope and pray that Jesus will touch their hearts with His LOVE for the little children and His Truth! Even the dear priest commented on how the tears of little children and Joy, (as she was dancing near my grandmother's casket), can be God's Presence.  Truly they are. He didn't mind in the slightest like I know some other priests would have. So He was a really blessing to us that day... and truly showed us all what Jesus is all about! He filled Jesus' shoes that day and I will be forever grateful for it!  :)

I have to say, while we were up there singing, I looked out a the faces out there in the congregation and many of the faces were stunned to say the least. They just looked to me as if they were thinking, "Well, I have never attended a funeral Mass quite like this before!!!"  And I have to say, after the Mass was done, almost every single person came up to me and hugged and kissed me and told me what a beautiful voice I had, (and Audrey too... who BTW ended up singing the entire Ave Maria with me, on key and unrehearsed!!!), and what a great job I did.  They didn't in the least say they were annoyed by Audrey's crying or presence up there! And that they knew my grandmother was so proud of me! Thanks be to God for people with hearts for Jesus!!!!!  Amen!!! Amen!!! Amen!!!

So, yes, my grandmother's funeral Mass most certainly did not go as they way I had expected or hoped, but, I truly believe it went exactly as God wanted it to go... and my heart is touched with Love, Joy and even holy Laughter and I am sure the hearts of others were as well, and I think that is how God wanted it.

My grandmother, as Audrey so sweetly reminded me... "is no longer sick!"  Indeed she is no longer sick but enjoying the riches and blessings of Heaven with our dear Lord of Love!!!  She is still very much a part of us and with us and always will be!  We LOVE her very much... she will be missed, but, truly she IS with us and praying for us as we pray for her!

Friday, August 17, 2012

We Are The Light Of The World... So Let It Shine!!!

In Sacred Scripture we are told that, We are the Light of the world and that we should let our Light shine before men, in such a way, so that they might see the good that we do and glorify God in Heaven! (Matthew 5:14-16).

How encouraging is that... to know that, "we are the Light of the world" and that we MUST let our Light, (ultimately, God's Light within us shine), in such a way, that in so doing... others might see the good that we do and give glory to God in Heaven! Praise God for this Good News... and may we be encouraged by it... and may it inspire us to go out into the world, ever more... and let God's Light within us shine for all to see, doing good works for the Glory of God's Holy Name!

Just a word about, "humility," that I feel I must share here... (and not just for everyone else, but for myself as well!).  I believe sometimes that Christians can have the wrong idea about humility, thinking that because God calls us to be humble and even clothe ourselves in humility that we are to somehow deny or hide our God given gifts and talents... (one of the greatest gifts that God has given us is His radiant Light, the Glorious Light of Christ shining within us...), of which He gives us not just to give true Light to our own eye, that we might truly see... but to the eyes of all the world so that they might see truly, the good that we do... and give glory to God!

Another gift that we may feel the need to hide at times, (in thinking that we are being, "humble," in so doing is the gift of Love God has given us...), and we are told that of the three gifts that God gives us... "Faith, Hope, and Love... the greatest of these is Love!" This is true.. and the power of Love can do amazing things in our lives and in the lives of others, yet, if we hide it... how will we ever accomplish great things for God that may give Him glory?  After all, we are born for greatness... and so we need to share the gift of God's Love and shine His Light for all to see to become the great people and accomplish the great things we are created to!

There are other gifts that we tend to hide in thinking that we are being, "humble," such as our talents, (whatever they may be... because we all have them, whether we may realize it or not... and they are different and unique for each and every person whom God has created with such Love!).

It is my special prayer today, that all of God's children will realize how very special and precious they are to our God of Love... our Creator... and that they will humbly recognize all the special and unique, God-given gifts and talents God has given them... and will share them with others and with the world... for in so doing... they will truly be letting their Light shine, God's glorious Light within them, doing th egood works God calls us to do... and others will take notice and give glory to God!

Peace and Love of God be with you my friends! 

                                                   God's Blessings are upon us!!!

Let it shin, let it shine... let it shine!!!  :)

Saturday, August 11, 2012

Finding Grace and Beauty in The Cross

Although, I have shared this in a couple of other previous blogs, still there are people who have not yet heard the news of what happened with me and my daughters following the birth of my second daughter, Grace. And since I have been thanking people for their prayers for us and asking for continued prayers... I'd like to share again, what has happened and where we are with it all today.

It's a long story, though, to make it shorter... what happened is that because I have a chemical imbalance that I have to take medication for and is very manageable and livable...  I ended up having post partun depression, which I am pre-disposed to having after the birth because of my chemical imbalance.

75% of women after giving birth, experience what is called, "the baby blues," and periods of sadness, tiredness, inadequacy and so on.  This is considered to be quite, "normal," however, if it persists for it can become post partum depression, or could have already been post partum depression, without the mother ever even knowing it.

Many women end up having postpartum depression after the birth of a baby, and despite what they might feel at the time, (like they will never overcome it and get better), they do and even up recovering completely from it and going on to live happy, healthy, blessed lives with their children, especially with God's Love, Grace and continuous Guidance... becoming the wonderful mothers they hoped they would be!

I experienced postpartum depression after the birth of both of my daughters, which manifested itself in the form of me becoming very exhausted from lack of sleep, staying up till all hours of the night with Baby Grace, who we found out later had gastrual reflux and cried and cried in pain and was much of the time inconsolable. This, because of my postpartum depression, made me feel very inadequate as a mother, feeling like I wasn't doing a very good job at consoling my daughter, and led me in a downward spiral of helplessness.

Some of the contributors to PPD are an unstable relationship, lack of support from a spouse, a difficult pregnancy, concern about the baby's health before and after birth, and exhaustion, as well as already being pre-disposed to having it because of a chemical imbalance, and also you are most likely to get it if you have already had it with a precious pregnancy. These are just a few of the contributors to PPD and it is no wonder that I experienced it because I had them all.

Aside from me becoming physically exhausted, (even having 2 complete days of vertigo that was so bad where I could barely walk and was very scary), my PPD also manifested itself in the form of anxiety which is also another common contributor, and unique to my experience with it, I became after the birth of both of my daughters, very over-protective of them, feeling like they were in danger and I had to protect them.

I had to be hospitalized both times to get the chemicals in my body balanced out, and while I was in the hospital after giving birth to my daughter, Grace, trying to heal from all the trauma I was dealing with before and after her birth, someone called the DCFS, (Department of Children and Family Services), and made a false allegation about me saying that I was abusing my children. Thus, they opened an investigation, and ended up placing my two daughters in foster care with complete strangers, with them being in two  separate homes.

It's been quite devastating on the whole family, though, most especially on me and my daughters. We have been praying that they will return home soon and asking others to join us in prayer... and hopefully, God willing they will return home this Monday. And then the Healing begins... especially for my precious daughters, for me and for our entire family... (for we have all been effected by this in varying degrees). God's Love is great and so is His Grace and it has been getting us all through this horrible experience to a brighter, healthier, happier "future full of Hope," that He has promised us!

I don't know exactly why this had to happen, why God allowed me to get sick with PPD or why He has even allowed me to have a chemical imbalance that pre-disoed me to having it in the first place.  All I know is, it's a part of my cross and in the cross is found great Grace, Beauty, Love, Joy and Hope if we but seek to find it there.

Perhaps, God has allowed all of this to happen in my life because He knows that with His continued Love and Grace and Hope I will continue to get through and overcome this trial as I have so many others in the past... and perhaps, this time... it's finally time to stop feeling ashamed of the cross He's given me and keeping it locked up inside of me as a secret only few have known about... but to lift it high and truly allow the radiant Light of His Glory to come shining through and from within me.

For, "It is no longer I, but Christ Who lives within me," Galatians 2:20 and how He longs and Loves to show His Glory through through those who live for Him and have suffered as they have lived their lives through, with, and in Him! Maybe, in so doing, I just might even be able to inspire others to do the same... to lift high the cross God has given them, (no matter what it might be), and allow God's radiant Light to shine through it and from within them... for their is great Beauty to behold in the Cross!

God's Grace has been carrying me and my daughters through this and will lead us back to each other very soon, so we can continue the beautiful new lives God intends for us to live. I just continue to pray that throughout all of this God Will be glorified and with thriumpth as He always does and that others will come to believe in Him and have even stronger Faith then before because of it!

Thank you for your ongoing prayers.  Many Blessings of God's Love, Grace and Goodness be with you and your family for your kindness! 

Sunday, August 5, 2012

Let Us Be Like Sonflowers!

Let us be like beautiful sunflowers... for we belong to the Son! ♥ :)
Let us be like beautiful sunflowers... forever growing upwards... with our faces always reaching towards and facing the sun... The Son of God, that is... who saves us, Loves us, nutures us, heals us and gives us new Life eternal, and ALL we ever need in Him! May God's glorious face ever shine upon us as we grow closer and closer to Him! :) ♥
                                                          So Keep on looking up!!! 

Monday, July 23, 2012

My Soul Proclaims The Greatness of The Lord

 Mary's Magnificat... (Her Song, And Mine Too)
My soul proclaims the greatness of the Lord,
my spirit rejoices in God my Savior
for he has looked with favor on his lowly servant.
From this day all generations will call me blessed:
the Almighty has done great things for me,
and holy is his Name.
He has mercy on those who fear him
in every generation.
He has shown the strength of his arm,
he has scattered the proud in their conceit.
He has cast down the mighty from their thrones,
and has lifted up the lowly.
He has filled the hungry with good things,
and the rich he has sent away empty.
He has come to the help of his servant Israel
for he has remembered his promise of mercy,
the promise he made to our fathers,
to Abraham and his children for ever.

Wow!!! What Beauty and depth of Spirit! What Love pours out from the soul of Our Blessed Mother upon hearing the Good News that She was with child and not just any child, but God's very, own Son, Jesus, Who would soon be born with the greatest destiny and purpose of all... to save the world and all mankind from the darkness of sin and death and with the gift of God's Mercy, Forgiveness, Love and His Grace...give Light and the gift of Salvation to all who believe in Him and give their hearts to Him! For Jesus came to give us Life, everlasting... so that our Joy may be complete! How full Mary's life must have felt, most especially on this blessed day... it is clear that her Joy was the most complete it had ever been in Her entire life up until that day, as She rejoiced in beautiful, spontaneous song!  :)

I can't help but say that this is how I felt with both of my pregnancies with my sweet daughter, Audrey and Grace!  Both times, upon hearing that I too was with child and that like Mary was called by God to be a mother, I too was called by God to be a mother as well.  The blessing I felt from God on both of those very special days that I will always remember and treasure deeply is beyond what I even have words to describe. With Audrey, on that first day I found out she was growing in my womb, I too like Mary was inspired to sing a new song of Joy, gratitude and praise to our God who brought my sweet daughter into being. It is my canticle, my own fiat, and I even recorded it that day and when I found out that I was pregnant with Grace, I also felt the exact same way... my heart was filled, once again, with so much Joy... that like with Audrey, truly my cup overflowed and still does to this day.

One of my favorite lines from that song goes like this:  "Forever life has changed, and only for the greater, God's Glory and God's Beauty, arising in my soul, with secrets far too deep, and sacred to even whisper, I hold and I cherish all this beauty in my heart!"  and then it goes on to say... "May my life be always an endless prayer in motion, of praise and thanksgiving to my God, Who's saved my life, and blessed me so deep, that my cup it runnith over, only Goodness and sweet Love will be with me in my life."

It's such a blessed gift to be called by God to be a mother and as much as I will always continue to cherish both my pregnancy journeys... just as much, if not more do I strive with all that I am to be as present as I possibly can to my daughters in every which way... and to cherish each and every, new and precious moment that God gives us... holding the and keeping them saving them and protecting them deep within the depths of my heart where they cannot be touched or corrupted, nor stolen from another. They were made by me and my daughters and God, of course... and they belong to us... for us to enjoy always and forever!!!  :)

I hope and pray that every mother feels likewise and I continue to pray for all mothers where ever they are in their journey of motherhood for God's great blessing to be upon them in the most special way! May the Christ Child bless, protect and be with them and their precious children as well! :)

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

A Future Full of Hope... Always!

Above is one of my all time favorite verses found in Sacred Scripture.  It was given to me from someone as a kind of gift many years ago when I was just entering my young adulthood... and it became a beautiful, glowing golden promise from God to me that has continued to prove true in my life over and over again!  :) 

In my life, I am forever running towards this precious promise of Hope God has given me and us all... and one might ask me, if they simply look at my life from the outside, "Well, have you reached your future full of Hope yet?"  The answer is... "Yes!" and also, "I'm still getting there!"

As Christians, living on this Earth, we are forever on a journey Homeward to our Heavenly Home and we are called by God to keep our Faith in Him strong whatever may come our way... and run the race before us to Him.  As we do so, we continue to reach and reach again this, "Future full of Hope," that God has for us! It is forever changing for the better and transforming to fit our needs as we grow in our Faith and life's journey.

God gives us all the gifts we need to make it through our lives, back to Him, in the most Graceful way possible! Life can be so challenging at times and among the other spiritual gifts that God gives us to endure all the trials we face in our lifetime, such as, Faith and Love... God gives us too, the gift of Hope to lift us high above, on the wings of eagles to help us realize His promises for us and His Loving will for us.

If we want to make it through life, and reach the finish line... and God, we've gotta have an endless amount of Hope in our hearts.... Hope Always, and in impossible situations, with the gift of Hope strong and bright in our hearts... they can be turned around and transformed... and the miraculous can take place! 

So keep on Hoping.... and asking God to fill your heart with more and more Hope and dare to believe in the beautiful, golden promise above that God has for us all! Your life will be blessed abundantly because of it!  :)

Wishing you a beautiful, Hope-filled day!  :)

Saturday, June 30, 2012

Feed Your Faith And Be Not Afraid

I just recently discovered this saying... and I really Love it! I think it's perfect for all people, and especially mothers.  Being a mother of one child or ten children... we have a lot on our minds when it comes to caring for our children, and especially when it comes to their safety.  As they grow up, there are always new challenges that will entice us to worry and even become fearful if we let them, but, I encourage you not to let them make you worry or be afraid... but to turn to your Faith in God and pray all the more!  Trust in Him, like never before... and He will give you all you need, a blessed assurance of His divine providence and protection of your children... and as you continue to trust in Him more and more... more and more, He will continue to bless you and your family in endless, new ways!  So, go ahead mothers, especially, but everyone really..."Feed your Faith! Your fears will starve and melt away!"

Be not afraid... and move onward on the beautiful path of Faith, Hope & Love God has so lovingly set before you!  And remember: He Loves you with an Everlasting Love... and always will!   :)

Monday, June 18, 2012

A Mission of Purity

Things are going very well in my life now... my two, beautiful daughters continue to bless and fill my life with the greatest Joy & Love and I continue to thank God each and every day for the gifts and blessings of them!

Throughout my pregnancy journey with both my daughters, I used to love to refer to them as, beautiful roses growing and blooming in my womb!  Now that they are born, continuing to grow every moment of every day... I like to continue seeing them as beautiful roses... and pure white ones as that.

The color white as we know represents purity... and holiness as well. When we see or think of a pure white lamb, we are reminded of the One True and Holy Lamb of God, Jesus Christ Who suffered, died and gave up His life... and ultimately and victoriously rose from the dead to take away all our sins, and wipe away from each of us the stains of our sins, making us new again, and pure and holy, like Him and enjoy new  Life everlasting in our Heavenly Home with Him!

That is why I like to think of my precious daughters, envision them as beautiful, pure white blooming roses.  I really like to envision all children this way because pure and holy is what they truly are and it's our mission and obligation as parents and a society as a whole to keep them that way, helping them to stay that way always! :)  I really do believe this and it's what I intend on continuing to do!

In an impure world, such as ours, this mission of which I speak of creates quite a challenge to say the least, though, I am up for it and I hope and pray that others will join me in this mission of helping to keep our children pure... and one of the greatest ways of doing this is by keeping ourselves pure as well.

No matter who we are, where we come from, we all have a story, don't we? None of us are perfect, still, God calls us to strive to be perfect.... and a sure way to strive to the road of perfection, in my opinion, is by striving to be pure, like Jesus in all ways.  God Loves us all so much, endlessly... and there is no sin or mistake too great that His Love and Mercy cannot forgive, take away and heal. God longs for us to return to Him time and time again for renewal and purification... and true miracles happen in our lives when we do.

If you haven't already... I hope and pray you will join me and countless others in the mission of purity... keeping ourselves and children pure! Some might say this it's a "Mission Impossible," though, we of great Faith know better... that, "With God All Things Are Possible!"  :)

Sunday, May 13, 2012

A Very Happy Mothers Day Indeed

Today is Mother's Day... and I'd like to wish all mothers... (maternal and spiritual alike), a very Happy & Blessed Mother's Day! :)

It's a very special Mother's Day for me, especially now that my beautiful and precious, new daughter has been born.  Grace Emma was born two weeks ago on April 28, 2012 and it was a very happy, healthy, Joy-filled, Love-filled, Grace-filled, Hope, filled, Faith-filled birth that only lasted 2 hours.

God is truly an amazing, faithful, awesome God! Although my pregnancy was one that was high risk... I continued to pray throughout it for God's strength, Grace, wisdom and Hope to see me through... (and His unconditional Love as well!).  God blessed me with those gifts and heard and answered my prayers and the prayers of others. With my pregnancy being as high risk as it was, nobody, (not even my doctors thought that I'd be able to carry my daughter to a full term delivery... yet, I continued to pray and have lots of Faith that He would... (knowing that the closer we got to a full term birth, the healthier my daughter would be!).  Sure enough, God showed his beautiful faithfulness.. and brought us through to a full term delivery, as I gave birth to my daughter, Grace, in the early evening, 1 day before my due date!  :)

As the popular saying goes... "God is Good... ALL the time!" And yet, when He clearly hears and answers of heart's deepest prayers... bestowing upon us such a blessed gift... a true miracle... we are truly ever so aware of His Goodness, His Love, His Faithfulness and Grace!  I am just so filled with JOY that my precious, new daughter was born happy and healthy and is doing very well! She's such an amazing blessing to me and my family... (as all children are!), and I just cannot thank God enough for the gift and miracle of her!

Like Mary, Our Blessed Mother... "My soul rejoices and magnifies our Gracious Lord... for He has been so Good to me!"  I praise Him with my song and with all my being!  :)

Today, as we take special time to celebrate the gift of mothers... I am so thankful that God has chosen me and called me to be a mother as well!  I am among the ranks of the most amazing, life-giving, self-giving, beautiful, nurturing and blessed women in the world... and I wouldn't trade my vocation as a mother for anything in the world!  :)

I plan to continue celebrating the gift and vocation of motherhood, (for all mothers), not just today... but each and every day! And I continue to pray for all mothers and their families that they will be truly blessed by God's amazing Love & Grace in every single way!  :)

Saturday, April 28, 2012

Doing What Comes Naturally

Well, here I am.. still at home at 39weeks and 6 days into my pregnancy journey with my precious, new daughter... (still growing and blooming in my womb!).  I am trying to naturally induce my labor, so that I will not have to be induced medically at the hospital Sunday evening, as my doctor would like me to if my daughter is not born before then.

So, it's been for me... the birthing ball, drinking red leaf raspberry tea, taking evening primrose oil vitamins, massaging clary sage on my ankles and wrists, drinking castor oil, eating pineapple and spicy foods.  I've also been trying to do a lot of walking and drinking lots and lots of water, which is said to be great for helping to bring on labor naturally and will be doing a lot more of that throughout the day today! I am also treating myself to a wonderful, full body, pre-natal massage, which is also said to really help to naturally induce labor and follow that by soaking in a warm bath with more clary sage.  So... God willing, all of these natural remedies should help bring on my labor quite a bit!

Of course, I've been praying to God as well, for His gracious intercession and intervention, to help speed this labor process along naturally, as well as continuing to talk to my sweet Baby Girl, letting her know that I am ready for her to be born.  It was so cute... as I mentioned, Audrey has been very involved in my pregnancy journey with my new daughter from the very beginning.

This morning, she lifted up my shirt on my belly and started rubbing it and said, "Keep going, Baby, keep going!"  :) I believe that, already, they have a very special bond and Audrey understands that her Baby Sister is also getting ready to be born, as Mommy has been preparing for her birth for all this time.  I was happy to feel my Baby Girl's movement last night and this morning, close to my cervix, (where her head is), since she has been head down, in birth position for quite a while now. I feel like it's a good indication that she is also getting ready for her birth and moving around and getting situated and most comfortable for her delivery.

I have been for a while now, but, now... I am truly in, "The Birthing Zone," as I like to call it... and am very focused on helping my body to prepare for a naturally induced birth, and am also helping my Baby to be prepared as well. I will not stop praying to God for His help as well... and I invite all of your continued prayers for us as well!

I continue to pray for all expectant mothers and their sweet, Little Ones for a happy, healthy and blessed pregnancy and birth and beautiful, blessed, Hope-filled lives together! :)

Friday, April 27, 2012

She Blesses My Life

When Audrey grows up, and if/when she decides to become a mommy herself, I believe she is going to be well prepared! She has truly journeyed with me throughout my pregnancy journey... attending all my doctor's appointments, seeing her Baby Sister on the ultra-sound screen, and hearing me talk about all my, "pregnancy stuff," her current vocabulary now includes... cramps, contwactions :), cerclauge, birthing ball, and induce to name a few! :)

She has watched Mommy's tummy grow, and grow and grow... and has prayed with me throughout this challenging journey, (having a high risk pregnancy), for a happy, healthy, and safe, full-term delivery. And she rejoiced and thanked God with me, for hearing and answering our prayers and bringing me and my Baby Girl, still growing in my womb, to full term... now at 39 weeks and 5 days!

Most of all what touches me the most about Audrey perhaps, as she's shared this most special pregnancy journey with me and her Baby Sister is how she continues to cheer me on and pray for me and her Baby Sister, as I continue to prepare for the birth of my daughter coming soon! She blesses my heart more than words can say! :)

I strongly recommend that other expectant mothers who also have children, (no matter what age they may be), try to find ways to include their children in their pregnancy journeys as much as possible! I believe that it truly helps prevent them feeling left out and fearful of the future, of having a new sibling and feeling like they might not get as much attention as they used to.  It really helps them to develop and prepare for their new role as, "Big Sister," or "Big Brother," and it really also helps form a very special bond between siblings that will continue to grow and blossom throughout their lifetime together! :)

Blessings and Love!

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Children Are A Blessing, A Gift And Miracle From God Above

Today me and my sweet Baby Girl, (still growing in my womb), are now at 39 weeks and 3 days into our pregnancy journey!  I can't even begin to tell you how very thankful I am to God for hearing and answering my prayers and bringing us this far! What a blessed miracle God has given us, and I don't take it lightly.  I continue to praise Him with all that I am for His Love, His Goodness and Grace!

Throughout this pregnancy with my second daughter and throughout my pregnancy with my first daughter, Audrey, I have continued to meditate upon the fact and sacred, God given Truth that, "children are a blessing and gift from God, the fruit of the womb a reward." (Psalm 127:3).  They really are... and today, especially I revel in this beautiful Truth and all the boundless Joy it brings me to realize that God truly has chosen me once again, to be the mother of another one of His precious children... a true blessing and miracle sent from Heaven above... and this too, I do not take lightly.

God's precious children He blesses us with are so beautiful, so precious, so innocent and pure that we, as parents can even feel unworthy at times of such a precious, priceless, beautiful, Heavenly gift from God... (at least I have at times).  Though, if and when we feel this way, we must especially remember during these times that it is God Who chose to bless us with these children in the first place, and certainly He must feel that we are worthy and capable and loving enough to care for them, Love them, cherish them and teach and raise to live lives that are pleasing to God and honor and glorify Him in all ways! :)

More than anything that is my Hope, wish and dream for my daughters... that they will continue to live holy, beautiful, Grace-filled, Love-filled, God-centered lives, with Christ as their Savior, Teacher, and Best Friend, and that their lives will always continue to be pleasing to God, bringing Him honor and glory in all ways!

I believe that a child cannot help but do these things from the very moment of its conception in its mother's womb, and I truly believe it's our great task and vocations as parents to not so much feel the need to teach and preach to our children how to accomplish this... but to simply look and listen and really see our precious children with the eyes, ears and senses of our hearts and souls and see how they are already doing that, naturally... and encourage and draw forth this God-given, blessed behavior and way of being. After all, it's children who have so much to teach us.... more than we might ever even begin to image, if we but only give them the patience, time and opportunity! :)

That's what is especially in my heart at this moment, as I truly continue to cherish these last few days, (or so), with my beautiful, new daughter continuing to grow and bloom and move about, so Gracefully in my womb... as I prepare for her birth!

I continue to pray for all pregnant mothers that their pregnancy journey with be the most special and blessed gift to them... and that their babies will be healthy, (and mothers too), and that they will have a beautiful, Grace-filled, Joyful, and blessed birth! :)

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Don't Let Anyone Steal Or Dull Your Sparkle!

Something I've been telling my daughter, Audrey since she was growing in my womb, and also tell my second daughter, (still growing in my womb), and will always continue to forever more is that they are both beautiful, beloved daughters of God, princesses at that and they have been created in the very image and likeness of God... to sparkle and shine with His beautiful Light, Love, Joy, Peace, Hope for all the world to see.

This doesn't just apply to my daughters but to all of God's children. Yes, we as God's beloved children bear the very image and likeness of God within us... in every bit of us, we carry His divine essence and it should never be hidden, but, revealed for all to see!

Jesus tells us in Sacred Scripture this beautiful Truth... “You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven." Matthew 5:14-16

 Isn't that amazing! So beautiful and so true! And it's really quite powerful if you think about it! Yet, at times, as much as we try to let God's Light shine within us we may find ourselves feeling discouraged when we sometimes encounter other people who have not yet become aware of what Jesus is teaching us about this, or perhaps, in their own lives have had people try to steal and dull, "God's Light shining within them," and may try to do the same to us... (and without even meaning to or realizing that that is what they are doing).

We can get discouraged at times, because just when we may feel we are truly walking in God's ways and letting His most beautiful and radiant Light to shine for all the world to see and bringing Him glory  because of it... we can encounter people who will immediately try to put us down in one way or another, say things that are mean to hurt our feelings, and even gossip and say things about us behind our backs to others that are not very nice and not even true.

When we encounter these kinds of people and situations in our lives, and are treated unkindly like this, it can cause us a great deal of pain.  Though, just remember that you are not alone, that Jesus suffered in the same way... so, "rejoice and be glad, for blessed are you, child of God!"

What we must remember to do in times like these, (as difficult as it might be at first), is to not take the unkind comments and attitudes of others personally.  Know in your heart that it is only because they have most likely been treated this way by others and are now treating you as they have been treated.  It doesn't make it right, but it brings a lot of understanding to the situation, and understanding people is exactly the kind of people that Jesus calls us to be!

Instead of allowing others to temporally steal God's Light within you, (by treating you in a way that makes you feel bad about yourself or guilty for letting it shine in the first place), pray to God and pray to Jesus who understands what you are going through. As for Their assistance, and pray for the person, and even bless them, (as Jesus tells us to), and God's Light within you will shine all the brighter... and in the process, you might even help bring back more of God's Light to that person... and this gives glory to God!

Remember... you are a beautiful and blessed child of God... and you've been created by Him to sparkle and shine with His radiant Light and glory for all to see!

So, let it shine... let it shine... let it shine... and while doing so, you just might inspire others to let God's beautiful Light shine in them as well! :)

Sunday, April 22, 2012

Thank You, God, For Blessing Me!

Thank You, God, for bringing me and my sweet, precious daughter to 39 weeks in our pregnancy journey together! I consider this to be a true miracle, (having such a high risk pregnancy), and I just continue to thank and praise You, with the most humble heart for your sweet Love & Goodness! :) Only You know when she will be born, and I continue, Dear God, to place all my Faith and Trust in You to bring us to that most special day and time! Thank You, God, for blessing me. Amen.

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Awaiting God's Precious Gift!

It's almost hard to believe, but in a very short time from now, my sweet, precious, little Baby Girl is going to be born! I am so very excited, and continue to pray to God to give me His Grace to have a really beautiful, Grace-filled, happy, safe delivery.

My Baby Girl and I have made it to 38 weeks and 3 days into our pregnancy journey together and I do consider this to be a true miracle and thank God for hearing and answering our prayers! :) It's been a challenging journey, though, I'm just so happy that my Baby Girl continues to be healthy and well! She will be born soon, and we will begin our new lives together... and what blessings God has in store for us!

Her nursery is all prepared, ready and waiting for her arrival and everyone is continuing to get really excited about finally meeting her face to face! Now that my cerlauge has been removed from my cervix, she really could be born at any time, and so, we are definitely on official Baby Watch... though, it's all going to happen in God's perfect timing... and so, I continue to place all my trust and Faith in Him... that He knows best when she should be born, and on the day and time... she will be born and it will be beautiful! :) In the mean time, I just continue to pray for her and for me too, and listen to my body as I await the signs and beginnings of labor.

Children are such a precious blessing and gift from God, and just like my sweet daughter, Audrey, has blessed my entire family in such an amazing way, I also know that my second, sweet, little daughter will do the same! :)

For me, a woman's pregnancy journey is the most amazing experience! And as you draw closer to your due date... you are filled with so much anticipation, so much Hope, so much Joy and excitement as you can only just begin to imagine all the Joy and blessings ahead that God has already prepared! And yet, as excited as I am, I just continue to truly cherish this last part of our pregnancy journey together, for it's such a sacred time, and it's just so beautiful, the very special bond a mother and her unborn child, growing in her womb share!

I continue to pray for all pregnant mothers and their little ones... that their pregnancy journeys will be blessed in every way, by our Heavenly Father's great Love, Care and Protection and that their hearts may continue to be filled with an endless amount of Faith, Hope and Love as they continue to prepare for the arrival of their sweet, little ones and their new lives together! :)

Thank you, so much, again, Everyone, who has continued to keep us in your prayers throughout this long journey! Your kindness and prayers are appreciated more than you may know! Please be assured of ours for you as well!

God is full of beautiful Goodness... and has an endless future full of Hope in store for us all! :)

Saturday, April 14, 2012

Always Believe That Something Truly Wonderful Is About To Happen!

"Always believe that something truly wonderful is about to happen!" With God... this is always true! :)

I am continuing to thank and praise God for the blessing and I will even say, "miracle," of bringing me and my sweet Baby Girl this far in my pregnancy journey... I am now, 37 weeks and 6 days into the journey and am now considered full term! My cerclauge, (my stitch in my cervix), was removed last week and I am still feeling great, with no real signs of labor, as my precious daughter continues to grow in my womb! Having a high risk pregnancy, my doctors weren't sure if we'd make it this far, and so we are all so happy... though, I am especially happy, because I know that it is God Who has brought us this far... and has heard and answered my prayers and the prayers of others!

I know that my life is about to change in every way, (for the best), and be blessed even more by God, for the birth of a new Baby brings to a family endless blessings and new beginnings. I am so looking forward to her birth and finally getting the chance to see her, face to face, (and not just on an ultra-sound screen), and to hold her in my arms, and introduce her to her family and the world! Her big sister, Audrey, is especially excited to meet her... and has been so incredibly wonderful, as we have talked about her throughout this long journey, and prepared for her. It's been quite a long time for a little one like her to wait, and yet, she's been so patient... always joyfully talking about, "Baby Sister," and even asking to give her a hug, (to hug my womb), before bed when she gives me a hug! I know that they are going to have a very special relationship and be very close. It is my heart's prayers that God will continue to keep them close throughout their lives... and that they will always be the best of sisters and friends! :)

I don't know what exactly God has planned for our lives... though, I continue to know and trust that whatever it is... it's going to be very good! God is forever Faithful to His Word and His promise! Long ago, He promised me a beautiful future full of Hope... and I continue to cling to that promise with all my heart... and it is the radiant Light and vision that leads me forward and guides all I do!

Friday, April 13, 2012

Don't Let Anyone Steal Your Sparkle... God Made You To Shine!

Something that I've been wanting to write about and say for quite a while now, to remind myself and teach my beautiful daughters and others is this... "Don't let anyone steal your sparkle!" In other words, you know that radiant, glorious Light of God that lives and shines within you and makes you special and unique and perfectly YOU... don't ever let anyone, no matter who they are, ever take that from you, rob you of that precious gift of Light that God has given you. God has given each of His children that Light... and we are meant to sparkle and shine for Him... and when we do... this brings Him even greater glory!

I believe this is a very important reminder for me to put down in writing for myself, and an especially important lesson for my precious daughters and others. And so, here's what else I have to say about it.

We are living in a world where not everyone believes in God, as our Heavenly Father and Creator of the Universe And even if they do believe in God, they don't believe that He is Loving, Good, and has a future full of Hope prepared for us. Unfortunately, there are many people like this in our world, who are living very sad, depressing lives and are even filled with anger, vengeance and rage that they not only take out on God, but others, especially those who Love Him and serve Him and shine and sparkle with His Love and Light!

They are able to recognize... miles and miles`away, a beautiful child of God... and God's Love and Light that they radiate... and they declare war in their mind with that person, before ever meeting them... and will go far out of their ay to do everything in their power to try to destroy all the Good, Beauty, Light and Love that that person posseses within them. They wi

Thursday, April 12, 2012

So Many Blessings To Come!

I am so very excited that I have made it to 37 and a 1/2 weeks in my pregnancy journey! I'm continuing to praise God for His Love and Goodness, for continuing to hear my prayers to keep my Baby Girl growing in my womb, as long as possible, (considering that I have a high risk pregnancy and my cerclauge has been removed and so now, she really can be born at any time!). I am now considered full term in my pregnancy, and so I thank God, for this special miracle and blessing!

With the birth of a new Baby come endless blessings of Love, Hope, Joy, Peace and Goodness! I know that like with the birth of my beautiful daughter, Audrey, my life changed in every way, (for the best), so it will also continue to with my new, beautiful daughter! :)

Friday, April 6, 2012

With God's Love And Assistance... Preparing To Birth My Daughter Into This World

So, as I mentioned in my previous blog, I had a bit of a false alarm yesterday, (thinking that I was possibly leaking amniotic fluid), and was told by my doctor's office to go to the hospital to find out if in fact that was the case. After about four hours of monitoring my Baby's heartbeat and monitoring me for contractions, as well as checking to see if I was leaking amniotic fluid they discovered that I was not leaking fluid and my Baby Girl was doing really well, and I was having very minimal contractions that I could not even feel, they let me leave for a while, though, I still was scheduled to return in the evening to have my cerclauge removed from my cervix.

I have to say that being a person with performing arts background, who is quite used to having dress rehearsals before a big performance, and knows the benefit of having them, having to be at the same hospital yesterday, where I will soon be delivering my sweet Baby Girl soon, felt in a lot of ways like a dress rehearsal, for one of the most important, special, and Life-giving performances of my life. I know that giving birth is not really, "a performance," but is actually a very sacred life experience... and yet, just like in any performance I've ever given... it requires that you truly give it your "All!" and it requires that you utilize every once of passion, strength, inspiration, and Life-giving forces within you to bring it forth, (birth it forward), into this world in the most beautiful way!

Being a Christian who also happens to be a performing artist... I really don't even like to look at my, "performances," as such, but rather, as sacred experiences where I am blessed enough to be able to use and share the gifts that God has given me with others... to hopefully, make more apparent God's real Presence of Love that is in our midst! I feel that I do this especially when I am singing, and sharing with others the music God has inspired me to compose and share.

I share that, because, when I think of giving birth to my second daughter, I realize that just like when I'm singing my songs about God and His Love, I invoke His Loving Presence and Spirit to be with me, to sing through me and be with us all, in very much the same way, that I did with my first daughter, Audrey's birth, and I intend to do the same with my second daughter's birth as well!

For although, God has chosen to graciously bless me with another child, another beautiful daughter.... still, I could never be more aware that I didn't make this happen all on my own, but it was through God's Loving and divine intervention and providence that my precious daughter and God's beloved daughter was conceived in my womb and came into being! It has been ultimately God's Love, Care, and Grace that have kept her cradled safely in my womb for the past, (almost 37 weeks), and it will most certainly be God's Loving Presence within me and her, in the delivery room on the day of her birth that will truly help birth her into this world! It's such an amazing miracle to even contemplate! And it is my main focus to help me to, with God's Gracious assistance, to prayerfully birth her into this world! :)

Thank you, very much, again, for all your prayers for me, my Baby Girl and family! Please be assured of mine for you and yours... especially during these holy days as we prepare to celebrate Easter in a couple of days! :)

Thursday, April 5, 2012

Getting Closer... But Still Not Close Enough!

Today is Holy Thursday. Our Lenten journeys have come to a close and the 3 days of the Holy Tridium are now here. So far it's been a pretty blessed and eventful day for me and my sweet Baby Girl, still growing and blooming in my womb! :)

This morning, it appeared to me that I was possibly leaking amniotic fluid, and I called my doctor's office and they told go to go straight to labor and delivery at the hospital to have it checked out. I am already scheduled to go back there this evening to have my cerlauge, (the stitch which my doctor had to put in my cervix to prevent it from continuing to open more prematurely than it already was), taken out. I was not sure what was going to happen.... if I really was leaking fluid, and if I might even go into labor, so just in case we brought all my bags and labor-gear with us!

Fortunately, (and thanks be to God), I am not leaking any amniotic fluid and after they monitored my Baby's heartbeat, (which continues to sound great), and monitored me for contractions, they called my doctor and she said that I could leave for a while and then come back later this evening! So, needless to say, it was a bit of a false alarm... but a good dress rehearsal for when I do go into labor! :) I hope and pray that it will be that easy and go that smoothly, getting out the door and to the hospital as Gracefully as I was able to this morning! It did for Audrey's birth... and so I pray that it will be the same with my second daughter's birth as well! May God continue to be with me throughout it all! :)

One of the extra-special blessings in all of today's events, so far, was that just as I was getting ready to be released from the hospital, I happened to hear an announcement over the intercom about Mass being offered in their chapel, so my mom and I were able to make it to that and also receive a very special blessing from the priest for my Baby Girl, me, my mom and our whole family! What a lovely gift from God to receive on Holy Thursday... and to be able to receive Holy Communion and attend Mass, (which I wouldn't of been able to do this evening!). God is so Good... and I'm so grateful for His endless Love! :)

Today, I am at 36 weeks and 4 days into my pregnancy journey.... it's such a blessing from God and a gift to have made it this far, (especially with my pregnancy being as high risk as it has been). 37-42 weeks is considered full term, and I will be 37 weeks on this Sunday... Easter Sunday! I am praying to God for a special miracle that He will help us hold out and keep my daughter growing safely inside my womb at least until at least 38 weeks, (if not even closer to my due date), though... I have to continue to TRUST in God's unfailing and Loving will and perfect sense of timing and providence! Only God knows when my daughter is supposed to be born, and I trust that He will bring her into our world exactly when she is meant to be born! God's timing is always perfect and His Way is always the best and so I will just continue to TRUST in Him! :)

Thank you, again, for all your prayers for me, my Baby Girl and my family! Please be assured of ours for you and yours as well! God's Blessings are abundant! I continue to keep vigil with all the other pregnant mothers and their precious Babies out there! May God's everlasting and constant blessings of Love and Grace be upon them... and may He bring them and their Babies to a happy, safe and blessed birth! May these next few days leading up to Easter be truly blessed for you and your family and may your Easter be Happy, beautiful and blessed in every way! :)

Friday, March 30, 2012

When A Woman Is Pregnant She Is Most Beautiful

I just have to say that no matter what anyone else might try to say... for me, when a woman is pregnant and with child, is when she is most beautiful and radiant! A true miracle of God's everlasting Love dwells and grows within her womb and she is so very close to God in a way, like never before! I truly believe this and just felt like sharing that!

Every child is a precious gift from God and to have the privilege of conceiving and carrying in her womb, and caring for this beautiful child of God is such an amazing blessing and gift from God like no other!

The journey of pregnancy is truly a blessed and sacred time in a woman's life. I absolutely loved being pregnant with my daughter, Audrey, and I also love being pregnant with my second daughter, now, (including the fact that I've had many unexpected bumps in the road, having a high risk pregnancy).

I feel so very close to God, our Blessed Mother, and the Child Jesus as well, as my beautiful child continues to grow and bloom in my womb like a beautiful rose in God's garden.

This Sunday, I will be at 36 weeks in my pregnancy journey... and I praise God, once again, for bringing us this far! My precious, little, Baby Girl will be arriving soon, and I am continuing to cherish the remainder of my pregnancy journey with her! :)

I thank God, for all the special blessings He has given me throughout my pregnancy journey and I look forward to all the new, beautiful blessings to come, once my daughter is born.

I continue to pray for all pregnant mothers especially, and may they know how truly beautiful and radiant they are, (especially now, as their precious child continues to grow in their womb), and may they embrace the gift of beauty that God has given them in their pregnancy, for it's truly a time for her to cherish forever! :)

Thursday, March 15, 2012

God Bless My Children

Something that I do a lot, though, over about the past week or so, I've really increased in doing has been asking God and praying that God please continue to bless my children, (my two precious daughters).

With having to continue being on bed rest with for the remainder of my pregnancy and also having my 23 month old daughter, Audrey get very sick this past week, my prayer continued to be throughout this time, "Dear God, please bless my children!" And the amazing thing about our prayers is that God truly hears them.... and answers them!!! :)

Last night, my daughter, Audrey was feeling much better, and I continue to hope and pray that she will be feeling like her healthy self again tomorrow for her second birthday! As for my other precious daughter, still continuing to grow in my womb... she's doing quite well and so am I. I had the privilege of seeing her beautiful face again a couple of days ago in another 3D ultra-sound and she's about 5 pounds and 5 ounces now! :)

My doctor plans to remove my (serclauge), which has been helping to keep my cervix from continuing to prematurely dilate, in three weeks. I am thankful that God has blessed me with a great sense of His Peace in knowing that... truly our lives continue to be in His Loving hands and that, whenever my daughter is meant to be born, she will.... and it's all going to be OK. I trust that whenever God decides for my daughter to be born, that she will be born healthy, and her birth will be beautiful and Grace-filled like Audrey's was! :)

Until then, I just continue to take it easy, pray my way through each day.... (something I did before I was pregnant with my daughter and something I plan to continue forever more...), and trust in God's infinite Goodness and Love as I continue to prepare my life, heart and family for the arrival of my new daughter! :)

Thank you, all, for your prayers for me and my Baby Girl and family.... we appreciate them so much and I continue to keep you all in mine as well!

Friday, March 9, 2012

Our Lord Is Forever Faithful

"The LORD’S Loving Kindnesses indeed never cease, for His Compassions never fail. They are new every morning; Great is Your Faithfulness." (Lamentations 3:22-23)

Throughout my walk with our Lord, I've learned many things about what kind of God He is, how He is so unconditionally Loving, Compassionate, Merciful, Forgiving, and how He loves to bless His children who Love and follow Him. What I've especially learned throughout my Faith journey is that truly the Lord, our God is forever Faithful!

People on the other hand are not always faithful to their word, and will often times break their promises they have made to us and let us down and this can cause us a great deal of pain. That's because we are human, and not perfect, but God is perfect and never lets us down, and that is one thing that we can surely count on forever more!

Once again, as I continue on in my pregnancy journey almost to 33 weeks, God continues to remain right here by my side and in my heart! His Faithfulness to me is so beautiful and such a Loving gift, a true testament of what He is all about, as He has so far, and I believe and trust He will continue to carry me and my sweet Baby Girl to a safe and healthy birth!

I had my doctor's appointment yesterday, and was very reassured to hear my daughter's strong, healthy heartbeat... and I continue to pray my way through each and every day, (and praise God for His Faithfulness), as we come closer and closer to her due date near the end of April!

Having a high risk pregnancy can be a scary thing, even to a woman of great Faith in God, especially when you have doctors telling you how concerned they are about your Baby's chance of being able to make it to a full term birth, though, I am ever thankful for my strong Faith in God and His ever-constant Faithfulness, to see me through what I believe have been the most challenging times of all of this... and I look forward with great Hope to the beautiful, bright future He has prepared for us ahead!

So many blessings I've received so far, and still, so many more to come. And so many reasons to continue praising God for His great Faithfulness, Loving Kindness and Compassion that never, ever cease and are brand new each and every morning! :)

So I am very thankful for all the countless blessings I have received thus far, especially throughout this pregnancy journey, (and even with all the challenges I've had to face included!). And I'm so thankful that God continues to be so Faithful to me, and that I am able to share with others, though my own personal experiences just how amazing and awesome our God is!!! :)

May you be blessed in every way by God's unfailing Loving Kindness, Compassion and Faithfulness! And may He receive all the praise and honor that belongs to Him! :)

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

The Memorare... A Blessed Prayer

This prayer is one of the most beautiful and beloved of mine, of all the written prayers I have ever learned and prayed. I truly fell in love with this blessed prayer well over a decade ago, and as I began to pray it consistently through out my days, my Love for our Blessed Mother grew even more deep and real, as I in turn felt Hers continue to grow for me and even continues to till this very day!

It's truly an anointed prayer, (written by St. Bernard), and I'm so glad he was inspired to write it because praying this prayer has brought countless blessings and Graces to my life and the lives of so many others! I hope if you've never prayed this prayer, that you will be inspired to!

May this prayer and our beautiful Blessed Mother Mary bless your life and family in every way! And may all pregnant mothers especially be blessed by Her, Her payers and by praying this special prayer as well. Our Blessed Mother is here with us and Loves us as only a Mother can. She is praying for us always... interceding for us with Her earnest prayers, and as always guiding us and leading us closer and closer to Her Son, Our beautiful Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ! :)

The Memorare

O most gracious Virgin Mary,
that never was it known that any one who fled to Thy protection,
implored Thy help or sought thy intercession,
was left unaided.
Inspired with this confidence,
I fly unto Thee,
O Virgin of virgins my Mother;
to Thee do I come,
before thee I stand,
sinful and sorrowful;
O Mother of Thy Word Incarnate,
despise not my petitions,
but in thy Mercy hear and answer me.

Beloved Child of God

Just a few brief words to say how thankful I am to be a beloved child of God! What a gift, honor and blessing... and a princess of the King at that. Because of this, I have been given by God an innate dignity, Grace, Beauty, and future filled with endless Hope, Love, Goodness and eternal blessings that nobody can ever take away... ever, ever, ever! My daughters too, are beloved children, daughters and princesses of God and I want them to always remember that!

Wishing you a blessed day! Remember how much God Loves you!!! :)

Monday, March 5, 2012

Showered By God's Blessings!

So, I had my baby shower for my sweet Baby Girl, (growing in my womb), over this past weekend... and it was just beautiful... beautiful and special and lovely in every way! As I felt with my first baby shower with Audrey, I now felt, all over again... "showered with God's blessings of Love and Grace," by all who attended and helped me to celebrate my sweet Baby Girl, as we continue to prepare for her arrival! :)

It's really hard for me to believe that as of this Sunday, I am now 8 months pregnant! Wow! It seems like it went so fast, my pregnancy journey, and then again, still, at the same time, it's been a very long, and challenging journey... though, nonetheless, Grace-filled in every way with God's special blessings!

When I think of it going fast, I must remember that I didn't find out that I was pregnant until I was into my 3rd month, so, in a way, it feels as if, at times, that I'm only 5 months into my journey of pregnancy. Though, even if that's when my mind got the "memo," that I was in fact, really pregnant... still, my body sure knew from the very beginning, as I believe did my heart and soul! And that's the most amazing part of it all, this, "mother-child-God-pregnancy journey." All are so interconnected and intertwined... it's a true, sacred mystery, one of the most divine mysteries of both Heaven and Earth, and how very blessed are women, whom God has chosen to be able to experience and live this most beautiful mystery out... in all it's glory! :)

I absolutely Love being pregnant and am in no rush for it to be over... (including all the challenges I've had with my pregnancy being high risk)... it's truly one of the most blessed experiences of my life... and I just want to continue cherishing every single, precious moment in my heart and soul... and every blessed movement that my daughter makes, for this is truly a most sacred time between mother and child, so close... with each other and with God! It's just a marvelous, miraculous time... and I thank God for it with everything that I am!

That being said... as I come closer to my due date... my Joy and excitement and anticipation increase more and more! I am so excited to finally see my sweet Baby Girl, (in real life, and not just on an ultra-sound screen!). I am so excited to finally see her face to face... to hold her in my arms of Love, call her by her name and tell her how very much I Love her... as God does too! I'm so excited for her to meet her big sister, Audrey, who is so very excited to finally meet her face to face and has waited, (so very patiently), and also to meet the rest of my family, friends and our world!

I continue to trust that all our lives are in God's loving hands... and that He is continuing to take very good care of me, my sweet Baby Girl, Audrey and us all. Only God knows when my Baby Girl will be born, and I continue to trust in Him and His perfect timing and will! And so, as excited as I am for her to be born, I continue to wait patiently for that unknown, precious day, with Hope in my heart... as I cherish, so dearly, this remaining time of my beautiful pregnancy journey!

I feel so blessed by God and look forward with such great Joy to the future full of Hope ahead! For it's there for you and me and us all! :)

Friday, March 2, 2012

Keeping My Faith in God's Goodness, Love And Providence

As to be expected, the closer I get to my due date, (the end of April), the more and more excited I am getting! This Sunday, I will be at 32 weeks into my pregnancy journey... and I truly continue to praise God for bringing us this far! Having a high risk pregnancy has been an unexpected challenge, (to say the least), though, my Faith in God's Goodness, Love and Providence has brought me to this point, and I trust will continue to bring me and my sweet Baby Girl to a healthy, joy-filled, Grace-filled birth! :)

Tomorrow we are having my Baby shower and I am also very excited about this. It's a chance to really`celebrate this beautiful, precious Life, my sweet daughter, growing in my womb... and also celebrate the fact that I have just about made it through the most dangerous part, (from what my doctors tell me), of my pregnancy journey, for they say that at 32 weeks, (if she were to be born, her chances of survival are very good). Though, I have no intentions of settling for that, or stopping here... I am hoping and praying that I will make it to full term. I pray that God's Loving will continue to be done in my life! :)

With endless prayers of Faith, Hope, Love and Thanksgiving to God in my heart... I continue forward in my pregnancy journey as I continue on through the final stretch! God's endless blessings be upon all expecting mothers and their precious, little ones... (especially those with high risk pregnancies). May God calm their fears and anxieties and may they lean on Him and trust in His Loving Providence completely and His plan of beautiful Hope for their lives! :)

Wishing you all a beautiful and blessed day! :)

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Holiness And Purity Are Beautiful Things!

"Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me." (Psalm 51:10)

I think that the above is a beautiful and lovely prayer to pray from the Psalms, all year round, though especially during Lent and while preparing in our lives for something very big, such as the birth of a new baby in our family, a birthday, an anniversary, or another holiday or day that has significant meaning to us.

This prayer holds special meaning for me in my life at this time, during Lent and my 31st week into my pregnancy journey, as I not only prepare to celebrate the glorious feast of Easter but also to welcome into my family and our world, my precious, beautiful daughter, when she is born... (which is coming up soon!).

I always like to pray this prayer during Lent as I prepare to celebrate Easter, so that God will truly cleanse me of anything and all the things that might be within my heart and self that are keeping me back from experiencing His amazing Love and Grace for me to the greatest of my capacity. It's a simple, sweet, yet powerful prayer... and really can work wonders for us when we pray it with an open, humble heart, that yearns to draw closer to Him and live our lives completely for him in every way possible!

I am praying this prayer especially now, as I prepare to welcome my precious Baby Girl into my family and our world very soon. For she is so pure, so innocent and so close to God... that I want to be that way, myself, as much as possible as her mother!

It's almost unfathomable to even think about, just how pure, sweet, innocent and close to God and Heaven a precious child of God is, (while growing in it's mother's womb and when it is born!). I just want to do everything in my power to keep her that way, and also, my precious 23 month old daughter, Audrey that way, for as long as possible,(forever really!:), and the best way I can think of starting to do that is by preparing my own heart, soul, body, mind and being in the way of purity and holiness.

God asks us to be pure and holy always... and it should always be our aim, though, especially now, as I prepare for the birth of my sweet daughter, I am much more aware of that aim and goal and mission... and so, I come back to this humble prayer from the Psalms to assist me on my path of becoming more holy and pure in all ways, renewing within me a steadfast spirit, as God calls us to do!

Praying for everyone, as we all heed to God's call to be holy and pure! May this prayer above assist you in achieving this goal in your life as well! Many blessings of God's Grace be with you in all you do! :)

Monday, February 27, 2012

Becoming Like Little Children

Sweet Jesus tells us in Sacred Scripture, "Unless you become like a little child, you shall not enter the Kingdom of Heaven." (Matthew 18:3). He does not say this to be mean, but, simply because He Loves us, very much, just as God Loves us, very much!

We are beloved children of God... and God wants us to know that and live our lives with that beautiful Truth reigning. No matter how old we might be, we are still, and always will be God's beloved child, just like we will always be a child of our parents, no matter how old we might be.

God doesn't mean for us to act immature and childish, but, mature in our knowledge that we are God's child and need to rely on Him in all things and in all ways! He also wants us to be child-like, in our nature, trusting in Him completely, just like little children do... and walking beside Him always, not just as our Heavenly Father, but as our very Best Friend, our whole life through! :)

God's Love for us is so incredibly amazing and big, that we really can't even fully comprehend just how much He Loves us... it's a whole lot... that He surely wants us to try and wrap our minds around His Love... to contemplate His great Love for us often, and allow it to truly embrace us and transform us from the inside out, making us more like Him and His beautiful Son, our Lord, and Savior, Jesus Christ in all ways!

Children Love and follow and obey God naturally. They are born into this world doing that without ever having to be told! It's really, really true! And it's our job, mission, even, as parents to keep our children that way by encouraging that amazing Love they have for God, that tender obedience and desire to follow Him and walk beside Him always!

This is what I have been doing with my precious, (almost 23 month old), daughter, Audrey, ever since she was born... and it works beautifully! It's what I plan to continue doing in raising both her and my new, precious daughter, (due to be born near the end of April... very soon! :).

I pray that all people of all ages, will heed to Jesus' message to, "become like little children," as we seek to follow Jesus and God's ways and as we especially seek to one day enter the Kingdom of Heaven to live their with God forevermore!

Jesus Loves us.... and is especially now, more than ever calling us to walk beside him! :)

Saturday, February 25, 2012

A Woman's Gifts From God: Beauty, Grace and Beautiful Dignity

Well, I have almost made it, in my pregnancy journey to 31 weeks... and I am praising God for getting me this far. I was just speaking to another mother who also had a high risk pregnancy with one of her children, also having to be on bed rest for quite a while during her pregnancy as well, and she was saying that every day that she made it to was like a, "victory!" and I couldn't agree with her more! Truly... it is by God's great Love and Grace that I have made it thus far... (and also my prayers, I believe and the prayers of others who have been also praying for us!).

It is a victory, indeed that IO have made it thus far... and I am praying now, all the more to continue achieving these daily victories, as I hope and pray to reach my full term due date, (or somewhere very close to it), of April 29, 2012 to assure my precious daughter growing in my womb the best and healthiest beginning coming into this world. Your continued prayers for us are very much appreciated! :)

What's in my heart to write about today is the Grace and Beauty of a woman of God... and not just a grown woman of God, but,"a little woman, or young lady of God." Of course, I have my two daughters in mind first and foremost, but, I really am also thinking of all woman of God, (of all ages!).

Though, with my beautiful and precious daughters in mind first and foremost... I always want them to know how very beautiful that they are, (both inside and out), primarily, because they are daughters of God, His beautiful children created in His wonderful image and likeness of Love! And yet, even more than that... they have an amazing amount of Beauty and Grace because they are (young woman), little girls who will one day become woman of God!

And God has created woman with a very special Beauty, Grace and a beautiful Dignity... (for the simple fact that He has created us to be able to conceive within our very wombs, a human being, a little precious child of His, to carry, so lovingly within us, as it grows and is ready to be born into this world), whom we are responsible for raising into responsible, capable, God-fearing young adults, though, even then... we will always remain their mothers... and forever be caring for our children, praying for them and guiding them in many ways!

It's just truly amazing, the blessed vocation God has chosen to give women, by giving us the capability to become mothers and in essence share a very close bond with Him, our Heavenly Father, for as we learn in Sacred Scripture on several accounts, God's Love and Care for us is not only that of a Heavenly Father, but, also one of A Loving, nurturing Mother as well! And to share so close a bond with Him, as to receive the divine gift from Him, as woman, to divine ability be able to conceive a precious child within our very womb, and love and care for that child throughout her pregnancy and then give birth, (Life), to that child and continue nurturing and Loving and caring for that child their whole life through... is just an amazing, extraordinary gift God has given woman... and we are so, so incredibly blessed because of it! :)

That is most especially what I want my daughters, (and all women of God), to always remember and know and embrace, so fully, to the greatest capacity... our God-given Grace, Beauty and Dignity as women and the immense amount of power that we hold within us, to bear Life not just to our own children, but to the entire world as well, on God's behalf! That is truly something so amazing that we, as women, should never take lightly. And it's also something that no one can ever take from us... ever... ever... ever... because it's a precious gift God has given us to last our whole lifetime!

I am continuing to pray for my precious daughters and all woman of God, (of all ages), that they will always look to God, their Loving Creator, to always be reminded of who they truly are and His beautiful, Life-bearing creations, and that they will always see their own reflection, reflected back from within His beautiful and Sacred Heart of unconditional and everlasting Love, Grace and Life!

May we as woman of God, always be aware of our God-given gifts to bear His gifts of Life, Love and Grace, not just to our own children, but to all the world on His behalf... and always guard and protect and cherish this gift with everything that we are!

May we always walk with our heads held high, knowing that we truly embody the Life, Love, Beauty, Grace and beautiful gift of Dignity from God... and by so doing, may we inspire the world to draw closer to God... and bring help Him bring new Life in all it's facets into our world. Amen.

Wishing you all a very beautiful and blessed day! :)